Evidence Changes Perceptions

Whenever I get really anxious or nervous about a big change I turn to evidence – have I successfully done this before? Here’s my list of scary things I’ve been through and how they’ve worked out.

So, here’s the thing. Making a huge move from Edmonton to Vancouver Island is exciting, but it’s mostly really scary at the moment. Not having a place to live yet is causing me anxiety but I know in my heart it’ll work out because, well, things always work out for me.

One way for me to keep anxiety in check is evidence. To remind myself of the times in my life where I have successfully overcome scary things and in a lot of cases, they ended up better than I could have imagined. I have all of this documented in one of my journals and figured I would share the big ones with you.

  1. I was born 12 weeks premature at 3 pounds and in an incubator for 4 months. I wasn’t supposed to survive and here I am.
  2. I didn’t talk for almost 3 years. Lots of doctors suspected I had learning disabilities or speech issues. My mom knew I would start talking when I wanted to and I did. I don’t think I’ve stopped since. Seriously, I’m a chatterbox.
  3. We had to do a midnight move to get away from my mom’s first abusive husband. It was scary to leave with nothing but our bedding, a few toys, and a garbage bag of clothes but we were so much happier with just myself, my brother, and my mom.
  4. In grade 3, my teacher allowed me to work at my own pace and do what I wanted in class. By the end of the school year, I was doing high school and university level courses and my confidence soared.
  5. In grade 6, I decided that I wasn’t going to camp with my classmates because my parents couldn’t afford it. My teachers pooled money for me to go, changed the slip so my parents didn’t know there was a cost associated, and even bought me a sleeping bag to bring.
  6. I called Kids Help Line at 11 because things were terrible at home for my brother, sister, and I. We were removed from the custody of my parents within 24 hours and my grandparents took us in. It was a huge move but we were all safe, well-fed, and loved.
  7. I became my own guardian in high school so I could live on my own and look after myself. People came out of the woodwork to help me and I did well. I even graduated with honors.
  8. I went back to school as a mature student at took the first-ever Holistic Health Practitioner Program at Grant McEwan. I worked two jobs as well as went to school full-time to make ends meet. I graduated with honors with distinction and knew this was my path in the future.
  9. I went on my first real vacation as an adult to San Franciso. I went overboard with money while on my trip and ended up flat broke. I was worried about how to pay rent and came home to a $1000 cheque for a scholarship I had one and not even applied for.
  10. I was diagnosed wth PCOS and went for ultrasounds that showed 10cm cysts all over my ovaries. I was told I would never have children. I tried for years and cried almost every night and then gave up. Low and behold, I got pregnant with my beautiful Tenesea 3 years later.
  11. I was pregnant again a year after Tenesea and lost the baby at 11 weeks. I feel in my heart he was a boy and he would have been named Colton Michael. I believe his energy is still around now.
  12. My rainbow baby Azalee was born in 2012 after I extreme complications with Colton’s miscarriage.
  13. In 2013, I made the decision to end my abusive marriage. I didn’t really know what I was doing or have the financial backing to be a single parent. I knew I was done and the abuse needed to stop. It was time to protect my kids and myself and to create a new life for ourselves.
  14. In December 2015, I put my house up for sale and was going to downsize and stay in Edmonton. months later, after only one extremely low offer, I took it back off the market. It just didn’t feel right.
  15. In January, 2016 I started Onyx & Sage – a spiritual healing and intuitive readings business. In the first 60 days of my business being opened, I had completed over 20 healing satchels and intuitive readings for clients.
  16. I left my job in April, 2016 to start my own online marketing business. Once again, I didn’t have a great plan, I just knew there had to be more to life than commute-work-break-work-lunch-work-break-work-commute and I wanted to spend more time with my kids.
  17. In May, I started Build Create Grow and within the first month, I had enough contracts to cover my old salary and then some. It’s been going strong since.
  18. In June, I took a step back and realized I can work from anywhere there’s high-speed internet and started thinking about where I would be if I didn’t worry about what other people thought and took my fears away. Right away, I knew it was British Columbia. I’ve wanted to live there since I was a small child and saw the mountains for the first time. I also had a 5-year plan to move to BC when I married. I started planning my move and talking about it with others. My daughters’ father agreed with the change and gave us permission to move.
  19. At the end of November, I went out to Vancouver Island on a spontaneous vacation and completely fell in love. As soon as we were on the ferry headed for Nanaimo, I knew in my heart that this was the place where my daughters and I would end up. The ocean, the fresh air, the mountains, nature, waterfalls, the people, the food. All of it together was the place of my dreams. I knew this was home and could see my daughters really thrive there. It is further away from Edmonton than I had wanted but the Universe showed me where we needed to be.
  20. In January, after 13 days on the market, my house sold. Which takes me to where I am now. Completely debt free and ready to walk into the life of my dreams.

I’m worried about not having a place rented yet, but I’m focusing on the evidence before me. I’ll find an amazing place for Tenesea, Azalee and my pets. In 58 days (or sooner), we’ll be in a magical place where we can experience more amazing than we could have even dreamed. We can’t wait.

Bravely Walking Foward,

Jen Signature


2 thoughts on “Evidence Changes Perceptions

  1. This was absolutely beautiful, made me tear, you have been through a lot, and even though we have just met once I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you, your strength, your tenacity, and being a single mom, all what you have accomplished. You deserve peace and nothing but good fortune. Your girls are beautiful, funny and smart and have a very special place in my heart.
    My best friend moved to Courtney B.C 2 yrs ago, I miss her dreadfully and I have been wanting to follow her, you see I’m in a very toxic relationship, mentally it’s taking a toll, he doesn’t believe in art as a career and I fight everyday to keep painting, financially I’m cornered for now, but I will get there.
    So go breathe some salt air, you were bold enough to jump, the rest will work itself out.
    I emailed my friend Sonia ( she winters in Palm Springs) and asked her if she knew any places for rent, etc, I’ll let you know what she comes back with.
    Give the girls a hello from me, please.
    Xo jori


  2. Hi Jen. I recently moved to the valley (arrived on Nov 3/16!) from Edmonton and feel you and I have some similarities. We could benefit from chatting a bit with each other. I’m a mom to three amazingly handsome teenage boys and we are also looking for a place to call home here in the Comox Valley. Email me if you want at jessieja37@gmail.com. I love to talk more with you!



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